Monday, July 6, 2009

Being Present...

I'm not sure why I haven't written on here lately. I have been rather busy, and most recently sick with a bad case of the flu. I have been at a loss for words as well. Before my vacation, I was in much need of some rejuvenation. I got that on vacation. I came back and was thrown into a whirlwind of craziness of being back at work, with a new summer schedule, various staff out because of injuries, my boss leaving for a long vacation, lots of new kids, and then to top it off I had to get sick. It's been intense. Amidst all that I am struggling to find balance in my life, what things I feel are most important, things I need to keep sane, where I will seek my spiritual needs, basically trying to prioritize and re-evaluate.

This has been an amazing first "almost" year at Cunningham and here in Champaign-Urbana. But now that I am settled in, comes the joys of seeing what worked this year and what didn't, what I need more of, what I can do with out. Also the ever coming future is out there in the distance as well. I try not to think about it but I can't. I always have been a planner, note making, to-do list fanatic. I just like to know what's next, and what I need to do to get there. I have always wished I was more spontaneous, laid back, and go-with-the-flow, but that just hasn't been me.

I guess it is only fitting that I would find a guy, that is spontaneous, laid back and go-with-the-flow. Sometimes it drives me crazy, like when he randomly says, "We are having dinner with my mom in an hour", when I am out grocery shopping. But it's great at times, especially after a hard week, and at 11 at night he says, "let's go swimming!" or we just veg out and watch a movie (meaning he watches it and I fall asleep usually). I'm learning to embrace whatever very small spontaneous side of me there is. It's made for some relief from the stress and intensity of work.

This post is really random and babbling, but you know me! I'm all over the place with trying to figure out life, the next step, what I want to be when I grow up. But as I was looking at my journal and reflecting on the one thing I really wanted to do during these 2 years, I realized that over and over I said these things:

BE PRESENT IN THE MOMENT...be present in my job, with my friends, with the community
HAVE FUN
Don't get caught up in the future and forget to embrace the present

So I guess I should take my own advice and try to be present in the moment. The present is good, (minus this stupid flu, but it made me slow down, so I guess its not too bad), the present is greater than I could have ever imagined, the present is teaching me so much each day, I am growing in the present.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Welcome to Durham

Welcome to Durham, NC...one of the coolest cities in my opinion. Here are some pictures from where my parents now reside. This is a picture from the roof of our parking deck, where you can see the lucky strike water tower. This used to be a tobacco town.
This is a view of the city, you can see my church sticking up in the distance!


Here it is, where my parents now live! It's on the 2nd floor in the blue building with yellow trim.


We live above a pharmacy. I love that my family are city dwellers now! And below is a view of the inside. It is really hard to show pictures of the inside you must come and see it, it is something you don't fully grasp until you enter inside. Needless to say I love this place!!! We leave tomorrow for the beach, but I am excited to walk to church in the morning and on Monday get some coffee down the street!







Sunday, June 7, 2009

Salt Water for the Soul

In 5 days I leave for my vacation in the great state of North Carolina! And in 7 days I will be at the glorious beach, Emerald Isle. Some of you might be asking, where??? Well is is one of the many beautiful NC beaches. My family has been going here ever since before I was born and it has become one of those places you just can't stay away from. Last year we went to Sunset Beach and although it was beautiful, Emerald Isle holds a special place in my heart.
Maybe it's the tradition, maybe its the great bookstore they have there, maybe its all the memories that come up each time we arrive. I can't wait to see views like these, walking to the pier, sitting on the porch and looking out across the ocean.
I am in beach withdrawal and I have been excited about this vacation all year! I am excited to spend a week away in one of my favorite places with my wonderful family:) I also am realizing how much I need a vacation. To be honest I am tired and need some rejuvenation. It's been a hard winter/spring and I'm in need of some salt air, water and sand to do wonders for my soul. Yesterday I picked up some books for the trip, I got some new music off iTunes, and I ordered a new bathing suit. I think I am more than ready for this vacation. So in one week I will be walking out on a walkway to the beach just like this, and when I see that glorious ocean, I think my soul will be happy...

Monday, May 18, 2009

Books I Want to Read

I have a grand plan of reading some books this summer. Here are some books I cannot find at the local library that are on my wish list now:) I will try to keep you up to date on what I am reading, if you have some suggestions, fiction or non-fiction send them my way!

1. God's Problem: How the Bible Fails to Answer Our Most Important Question--Why We Suffer by Bart D. Ehrman


God's Problem

* So many people have asked me this question lately (friends and kids) and I feel I need to take a look at some scholarly research on it.

2. The God I Don't Believe In: Charting a New Course for Christianity by Gary L. Wilburn

The God I don't believe in...
*This book sounds like a refreshing look at Christianity and it has great reviews
3. Leaving the Church-A Memoir of Faith by Barbara Brown-Taylor

*I am very interested in hearing from lots of female pastor perspectives as I continue my process of discernment, Barbara Brown Taylor is one such pastor. The review of this book was phenomenal and this was included in the review, "Anyone who is thinking about going to seminary; anyone that is thinking about leaving the church; anyone who is wondering why church has become so difficult; anyone who is wondering why good clergy are becoming more difficult to find; anyone who cares about the postmodern church; anyone who is trying to find a way to re-conceptualize their Christian faith so that it matches the reality of the twenty-first century, should read this book."

**4.Souls in the Hands of a Tender God: Stories of the Search for Home and Healing on the Streets by Craig Rennebohm

Souls in the Hands...
*This is the one I want to finish for sure this summer! This book is written by a Chaplain that has worked in the Mental Health field for many years, his perspective sounds wonderful and much worth reading. The review said, "I recommend this book particularly to professionals in the mental health field, to those who have struggled with mental/emotional problems, and to those who have mentally disturbed family members or friends. Your understanding and patience will be rewarded."

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Happy Mother's Day Mom:)


Mom,


I am so broke, so purchasing a present was going to be a little difficult this year so for your Mother's day gift I decided to give you a tribute here on my blog. So, Mom, have a wonderful Mother's Day!!! I wish I was there to celebrate with you, but last year I graduated for Mother's day & found out where I was going to be a missionary, so it's hard to top that! This year I am just a missionary starting my 2nd year of service haha. I love you Mom!


Love,


Your oldest, Brookie

The Top 10 Reasons (I could go on all day) Why My Mom is Amazing:)


1. Everyone loves her! No seriously, her choirs always love her, the kids love her, the parents do, she is just very lovable.

2. She teaches music and has always made music apart of our lives and never pushed it on us (well there was that one time with the Meredith Girls Chorus, I guess I forgive you!). Page took after you more than me, but I still love to sing.

3. She loves to go antique shopping and thrift store shopping. She always finds a deal and I love this about her. She also decorates our house in cool ways, and finds cool places to live like our new loft!!!

4. She always made time for us growing up, even when she was stressed, tired and busy with church work.

5. She has been extremely supportive of all my crazy mission endeavors. This means a lot.

6. When I'm home we love to go get coffee and a fruit bowl from Foster's and sit outside and talk:) I cherish these moments.

7. I talk to her every day, It's rare if we skip more than 2 days without talking. She's always there to listen to me vent, or to give some advice.

8. She is independent, she left home right after High School and moved far away to do what she really wanted to do. She did things she wanted to do before she settled down. She's not afraid to take risks.

9. She has always remained herself, through marriage for 25+ years, 3 kids, various jobs, many moves, and lots of change. She is still true to herself. She's been a good role model for me on that.

10. She raised the 3 of us to be good kids (well I guess she is still raising Amie!). She pinched pennies to get us on vacations each year. She made sure we had all we needed in school. She supported all we did.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Beautiful Boone:)





I am very behind on blog entries. So there will be few close together. 2 weekends ago I went to NC to visit friends, grad school, seminary, and tell people about being a US-2. It was a fast and crazy trip, but a much needed one. This post will focus on one element of the trip... My first time visiting my alma mater since I graduated a year ago.

I'm not going to lie, I was very apprehensive about going to visit. I mean I have moved on, my life has changed so much since I was in college. I loved most of my college years and I am grateful for them. But I wanted to run away from them as fast as I could, and I did. I ran until I got to Urbana, IL. I have many friends still in Boone. I missed them, but I wanted my new life. But I missed those mountains so much. Usually you do not appreciate something fully until you loose it. That is how I was with the mountains. So on that glorious driving up the mountains I could not help but smile and thank God for letting me live there for 4 years, and for letting me return.


The drive up was blessed with some wonderful conversations with my friend Kara. We are both working for very little money trying to save the world (or at least our small populations we work with). I'm so glad we have kept in touch, we have gone through similar things this year and it is comforting to have a friend that knows how you feel. Upon arrival in Boone I got to see so many people, it was wonderful!!!


Saturday, we woke up and went to breakfast at my favorite place, Melanies Food Fantasy (doesn't that just sound amazing!) It's an organic/hippee place that has the most amazing food. Their vegan biscuits and gravy are delicious, greek omlette is to die for, and the french toast is out of this world. I only had the french toast this time. But it was a wonderful way to start off a day in Boone, and it was extra special because it was my friend Sarah's Birthday!!! After breakfast we headed to the parkway! Like old times we congregated on lots of blankets trying to bask up the spring sun. Some of us got burnt, but it was worth it! My dear friend Kelly brought her guitar, morrocas, and tamborine and we rocked out to our favorite jams and there was even a hippee dance involved (are you suprised?).


Dinner that night was lovely with seeing more friends and celebrating Sarah's birthday:)


Church in the morning was unexpectedly wonderful. I got to see people I didn't expect to, like Jennifer and Robert + The Hege's + Reed + The Farrington's. It was such a God send. Lunch with some people, and then Megan and I were off back to Durham.


It was an emotional weekend, realizing things had moved on with out me, but also so much stayed the same. I realized how much I have changed, and I thanked God for changing me. Boone is still one of my favorite places in the world. Those mountains are good for the soul:)

DUKE/CAROLINA


While I was down in NC, I visited both Duke and Carolina. Duke for their Master's of Divinity Program and Carolina for their Master's of Social Work Program. They offer a Dual-Degree program that you can complete in 4 years between the 2 schools. I was very interested in the program and wanted to check it all out. I am still in discernment mode on all of it. I have a lot to still chew on after visiting the 2 schools. I was very impressed with them both. I just have a lot to think about with it all. I would apply to both in probably September and would hear from Duke by Christmas, and Carolina in probably February. I haven't had much time to process since I got back so I hope there is some time this summer that I can really spend time figuring things out. We will see what the fall of 2010 will bring... it will be a hard transition from working full time back into school. But to do what I want to do for the future I need to go to seminary at least. Oh decisions, decisions...I'm just trying not to rush this one.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Jesus - The long-haired radical socialist Jew

My friend shared this on her blog today and I just loved it and had to share it with you all!

Well Jesus was a homeless lad,
with an unwed mother and an absent dad,
and I really don’t think he would have gotten that far,
if Newt, Pat, and Jesse had followed that star.

So let’s all sing out praises to
that long-haired radical socialist Jew.

When Jesus taught the people, he
would never charge a tuition fee.
He just took some fishes and some bread
and made up free school lunches instead.

So let’s all sing out praises to
that long-haired radical socialist Jew.

He healed the blind and made them see;
he brought the lame folks to their feet.
Rich and poor, anytime, anywhere,
just pioneering that free healthcare!

So let’s all sing out praises to
that long-haired radical socialist Jew

Jesus hung with a low-life crowd
but those working stiffs sure did him proud
some were murderers, thieves, and whores
but at least they didn’t do it as legislators

So let’s all sing out praises to
that long-haired radical socialist Jew.

Jesus lived in troubled times—
the religious right was on the rise.
Oh what could have saved him from his terrible fate?
Separation of church and state.

So let’s all sing out praises to
that long-haired radical socialist Jew.

Sometimes I fall into deep despair
when I hear those hypocrites on the air.
But every Sunday gives me hope
when pastor, deacon, priest, and pope
are all singing out their praises to
some long-haired radical socialist Jew.

They’re singing out their praises to…oooo…oooo…
some long-haired radical socialist Jew.

© 1996 Hugh Blumenfeld/Hydrogen Jukebox Music

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Jumping into a pool with your clothes on!


I wanted to give a little tribute to my dad on his birthday today! I thought I would give a little highlight as to why I love my dad and am lucky to be his daughter, here goes!

1. When I was little my dad jumped into a blow up plastic swimming pool with all his clothes on because I asked him to come in swimming with me right then. (he tells this a lot in sermons)

2. My dad let me grow up in a downtown neighborhood where I learned a lot about diversity, downtown culture, and being open-minded. It has helped me throughout my life.

3. He always took us to all the cool (and sometimes hole in the wall) local places to eat.

4. He shared his love of pizza with me and I am forever grateful. Brother's pizza will always be the best!!!

5. His midlife crisis consisted of becoming more radical, he participated in Peace Rallies.

6. He cares a ton about people, especially broken people.

7. He has been doing Youth Ministry for over 25 years and he still is good at it.

8. He speaks his mind.

9. Takes me to the beach every year.

10. Is always there for me, even when I would get mad at him in High School or didn't believe that he was right.

11. He gave me the best advice on a relationship. When I broke up with Kevin he told me to go cold turkey and not talk to him for at least a month. I did and it was the best thing I ever did.

12. He encourages and supports me in my mission work and future plans for ministry, but never pushed me into it.

13. He's not afraid to take chances, and that has rubbed off on me. He even was the one that told me about the US-2 program.

14. He knows lots of musicians and I think that is super cool!

15. No matter how rough of a time I am going through, my dad always knows what to say to me. It might be in an e-mail, a card, or a short phone call. It might just be a sentence, or a hug. But sometimes I might not be better until he says something and then I can get through whatever it is. He has the magic dad touch.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!!! I love you:)

Monday, April 20, 2009

11 years old, WOW!


I can't believe my sister is 11 years old today! It seems just like yesterday that she was born! She is now almost as tall as me (this picture was from LAST summer) and she is turning into a cool little tween. I got to spend a week with her this past week and she is turning into a wonderful young lady. We had afternoon tea at the American Girl Doll Store in Chicago and it was the best time I have had in awhile! She was so cute and we had a blast just talking about all kinds of stuff. I like that now we can actually have a conversation. I always regret not being around for her enough once I moved off to college, 3 hours away, and now to Illinois, 12 hours away. It's hard because I want to be there for her and see her grow up, but I also know this is where I am supposed to be. She is great about it though, she misses me but is so supportive of what I do. She tells all her friends that I am a missionary and live in in Illinois. This year she even put my birthday up on her class calendar. She is the best little sister. I can't believe she will be going into MIDDLE SCHOOL in the fall, that scares me! I want to protect her from everything, but I know I am still far away and can't do it all. I hope she knows just how much I love her and will always be there for her no matter the distance. She is a great kid:) I hope to be closer to her after the 2 years are up but you just never know what will happen. I am excited I will see her Thursday too and she wants me to play the new Wii she got for her birthday with her and I can't wait:) So this is my salute to my little sister, whom I affectionately call my Little Princess! (she is spoiled!!!).

HAPPY 11th BIRTHDAY PRINCESS AMIE!!!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Christ the Lord is Risen Today, Alleluia!






These were the images I got blessed with seeing today! A beautiful Cross with a butterfly, a tomb with flowers, kids & youth (whom some dressed up and it was ADORABLE!), and some balloons! I woke up to a text from my brother wishing me a Happy Easter:) Then I went to a breakfast at church, which was delicious! After that I sat through a 1.5 hour church service that would have not been too bad BUT they did NOT sing, Christ the Lord is Risen Today, which is my favorite hymn. I am pretty sure this is the first year in my whole life I have not sang that song on Easter. My friend Caci and I were devestated. We also had communion, which was different and they and "Were you there?". It was just different for me, but I guess I will survive. Tonight I am going to a Easter dinner at my friend Kristen's and I am going to ask her husband to play Christ the Lord is Risen today, on the piano because I need to hear it!

After service #1, my boss and I ventured to work to begin filling up LOTS of balloons. We had a few issues with finding the key to the helium tank and all kinds of fun things. But after about 30 minutes of wasted time we started filling them up and then had to transport them from the Rec building, to the van, to the Spiritual Life Center, and then to the Chapel. It was hilarious and I have so much static in my hair and body I keep getting shocked! We just barely were ready at 2 when the kids arrived. Things went well for the most part, there were a few hiccups but I think only my boss and I noticed. My favorite part was the balloon release at the end! The kids wrote down something they wanted to, "Let Go, and Let God" and tied it to the balloon. Then we all went out in front of the Chapel and released the balloons. The wind had picked up so they went really fast. I am surprised I even got a shot of them! We all shouted ALLELUIA as we let go of our balloons. It was a lovely Easter:)

I did miss being with family, but they will be here soon! And I am so blessed to have a wonderful group of friends to join together tonight and eat with:) I made some deviled eggs and watergate salad to make myself feel a little at home! HAPPY EASTER TO YOU ALL! It truly is a blessed day to celebrate the Risen Lord, the empty tomb gives us hope for a new life!

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Gone to Carolina in my mind


Oh how I miss the great state of NC. Yesterday on Oprah, James Taylor performed! It was lovely to listen to him sing some of my favorite songs. It took me back even for a moment to NC and the warm sunshine. I always remember my dad singing Fire and Rain with my mom at church things and so when I hear James Taylor I just can't help but get a little sentimental and home sick. Good thing my parents and sister are coming to see my Tuesday and I will be in NC on the 23rd!!! I love it here in Illinois too, but I'm gone to Carolina in my mind...

In my mind I'm goin' to Carolina
Can't you see the sunshine
Can't you just feel the moonshine
Ain't it just like a friend of mine
It hit me from behind
Yes I'm gone to Carolina in my mind

Karen she's a silver sun
You best walk her way and watch it shinin'
Watch her watch the mornin' come
A silver tear appearing now
I'm cryin' ain't I
Gone to Carolina in my mind

There ain't no doubt it no ones mind
That loves the finest thing around
Whisper something soft and kind
And hey babe the sky's on fire,
I'm dyin' ain't I
Gone to Carolina in my mind

In my mind I'm goin' to Carolina
Can't you see the sunshine
Can't you just feel the moonshine
Ain't it just like a friend of mine
It hit me from behind
Yes I'm goin' to Carolina in my mind

Dark and silent late last night
I think I might have heard the highway calling
Geese in flight and dogs that bite
Signs that might be omens say I going, going
I'm gone to Carolina in my mind

With a holy host of others standing around me
Still I'm on the dark side of the moon
And it seems like it goes on like this forever
You must forgive me
If I'm up and gone to Carolina in my mind

In my mind I'm goin' to Carolina
Can't you see the sunshine
Can't you just feel the moonshine
Ain't it just like a friend of mine
It hit me from behind
Yes I'm gone to Carolina in my mind
Gone to Carolina in my mind
Then I'm on to Carolina in my mind
Gone to Carolina in my mind
Gone - I'm gone - I'm gone
Say nice things about me
'Cause I'm gone south
Carry on without me
'Cause I'm gone

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Feet

Last night at Chapel, as we experienced a Seder Meal, I also got the humbling opportunity to wash my kids feet. Some of course didn't want their feet washed because it was a very intimate and different experience. But the ones that did let me wash their feet I am very grateful to because it impacted me so much. As I washed this one girl's feet, I just had to pause to think that this was such an amazing moment in time because, this girl,

1. is extremely hyper all the time so for her to calm down and let me wash her feet was amazing in itself.

2. This is a girl who has lost most of her family in a house fire a few years ago, she is bipolar, many days she drives me up the wall and I think she might be the kid I struggle with the most.

But as I washed her feet I said a prayer thanking God for letting me be humbled in that moment, to be able to wash her feet, to serve her. She thanked me over and over again, and I told her it was my honor. As I moved around the tables washing different kids and staffs feet, I wish I could bottle up the emotions that were in the room. There was some laughter, but mainly just a bunch of kids and adults all joined together in that moment, all being humbled at the act of footwashing. I think some of my kids felt like the disciples, completely baffled as to why someone, especially Jesus (their leader) or Me (their kinda leader) would want to wash THEIR feet. Especially at Cunningham this was even more of a wild and radical thing because staff really do not touch kids unless we have to. We must do side hugs, and we are always telling the kids to be careful of boundaries. But in this moment we let ourselves be completely vulnerable and let someone touch their feet. Sometimes we need these intimate times within our communities. As we concluded our service last night and our guest muscian of the night, Nate, started singing Open the Eyes of my Heart Lord. I could not help but think how fitting that sound was because that night my eyes/heart needed to be opened and when they were, I saw feet and they were such beautiful feet.

Reflect upon the intimate nature of footwashing and hopefully one day soon you will be able to participate in a footwashing.


Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Email Encouragement

Sometime's an e-mail from someone you only barely met can be a good push to get through a day. I got an e-mail from Bart Campolo who I have mentioned in some previous posts after I heard him speak the Youth Retreat here in Illinois. He doesn't really know me at all but we have had some similar experiences and we can encourage one another through that. His e-mail wasn't long, but it didn't need to be. I am thankful for people and communities that are trying hard to live out the gospel and encouraging each other while they do. In part of the e-mail he said this:

It sounds like you’re doing great stuff, but I hope you have a community there to support you in doing it. This people loving stuff is really a team sport. On that same note, I hope you will feel free to contact me again if there is ever some way I can be helpful to you. I don’t know everything, but I know lots of good people all over the place who are into this kind of lifestyle and eager to encourage you newbies!

It made me pause and think about the community I have and if I want more in community. I have been blessed with some great friends here in Illinois that are there to listen to my endless stories about my kids, or there to just watch a movie when I need a break from it all, there to have deep conversations or just silly ones to have a good laugh. Then I have my US-2 Missionary community who are all going through what I am, but just all over the country. They are always there to talk and even when it might be months and months inbetween phone convo's it seems like no time has passed.

I do sometimes feel that I seek more in a community...
Communities like The Simple Way, The Rutba House, other monastic communities and the community Bart lives in...
They appeal to me...
I'm still pondering this...

Sunday, March 15, 2009

The Zoo: No Koala's, touching sharks, and Brutus the Walrus






I have been saying I would post a blog entry on my trip to Indianapolis 2 weeks ago, and I am just now getting around to it! It was a really fun day trip with my friends Erin and Eric. We had fun learning about Indiana through our brochures from the Welcome Center. I was amazed, Indiana sound like a cool state. Indianapolis is a cool city, my favorite part was Mass Ave. which is a trendy area with awesome shops, cool wine stores, chocolate store, and a cool kids shop. It was a beautiful day in Indy:)

I did want to point out that the Zoo was fun, but I was saddened by 2 things...

1. They falsely advertised in their brochures that there would be a Koala Exhibit. There were NO Koala's. Instead the new exhibit that was not open yet is going to be the Komono Dragon. I would rather see a Koala. Luckily there were Koala masks in the gift shop so I got to pretend I was a Koala.

2. The dolphin show was sold out. And all I wanted to do was see the freakin dolphins because I LOVE Dolphins. I used to want to be a marine biologist. My dream is to swim with dolphins. Instead we had to watch the dolphins do their show from below while we were in the viewing area. It wasn't too bad but I was still disappointed. But I did get to pet a shark, and that was cool.

Besides those 2 things I had a lovely day hanging out with friends, eating a yummy dinner, walking around a cool city, and enjoying the warmth of a rare warm weekend!

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Speaking up


Some of you might disagree with me on this post, that's ok, I will listen to your opinions as well, I welcome discussion, but here are mine. Back in July I wrote a post about needing to speak up for what is right. I had visited a church in Brooklyn that was an open accepting & affirming United Methodist Church. As all of us US-2's walked into that church and worshiped there that night, I know we felt it was a church that was accepting of all people. Before we even entered there was no doubt that they were accepting people because of their sign that was right beside the entrance, in Large font...

Hand in Hand, we the people of Park Slope United Methodist Church - black and white, straight and gay, old and young, rich and poor - unite as a loving community in covenant with God and the Creation. Summoned by our faith in Jesus Christ, we commit ourselves to the humanization of urban life and to physical and spiritual growth." -- The PSUMC Creed


I wish this was every church's creed. But sadly it is not. We still have so far to go with human & civil rights on the spectrum of Gay (GBLTQ) Rights and also with Race, religion, ethnicity, etc... I watched the movie MILK tonight about Gay Rights Activist Harvey Milk and his fight to not get Prop 6 (a law to not allow Homosexuals and Homosexual Allies to teach in schools or be in other forms of work associated with the government) Passed. He succeeded right before he was assassinated. He said these words that stick with you,Harvey Milk: All men are created equal. No matter how hard you try, you can never erase those words.

Now many years later, California faces Prop 8. One more obstacle for the gay community. And the people that want Prop 8 to pass, are the Christians. Some say, "fundamentalist Christians"...but sadly it's not just the fundamentalists that are at fault, it is all Christians. We should not be standing in the way of civil rights. Jesus, the one we all claim to follow, I honestly believe would NOT be standing in the way of civil rights for homosexuals. You might disagree with me and you are free to your opinion. But the Jesus that I follow and am trying to serve each day would have wanted rights for Gays and people of all sexual orientations and backgrounds. Jesus loved us all, he does love us all. There is no way I can look into the eyes of some of my kids that I work with that have come to me and told me they are struggling with their sexual orientation and tell them they are going to hell or might need to get "fixed". There is no way I will tell them that they can never act on it, because who is to put defining lines around who you can and cannot love. There is no way I can look my friends that have come out to me over the years in the eyes and tell them that I will not be their friends because they are gay or lesbian. And I choose to think that I will end up in a heaven where they are there too, because I know that the God I worship loves all his children. My friends that have come out to me, tell me I am rare in my thinking. But honestly I think there are a lot more allies for the gay community out there with in the Christian community, but people are just afraid to speak up.

To know that not too many years ago, if Prop 6 could have passed in California, and I had become a teacher...and considering that I am an ally to the homosexual community, I would not have a job. That scares me! We might think we have come a long way, but we are still so far from truly accepting all those around us.

Harvey Milk, was an amazing activist, he was passionate about getting rights for his community that he loved so dearly. He said that if everyone could just know 1 person that was gay, that they would not vote for Prop 6. I wonder if the same would be the case for Prop 8? I wonder if the same would be for any civil rights and human rights issue. And not just know a person in passing but truly know someone you care for.

As the Christian community, have we truly gotten to know ALL of our neighbors? I don't think so. Jesus' commandment was to LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF. Do we truly take that to heart? If we truly loved ALL of our neighbors as much as we love ourselves, then we would be living in a very different world. Maybe the problem is we don't love ourselves. I did have one of my kids tell me the other day that she has a hard time loving herself, and that is why she has a hard time loving and being nice to her peers. I don't think she knew how profound she was. Love yourself, then go out and love your neighbors. As the old Christian song goes:

"They will know we are Christians by our love, by our love, they will know we are Christians by our love"

Where is our love? Do others know Christians by their love?

I have a dream too, like Martin Luther King Jr. did, like Abe Lincoln did, and like Harvey Milk did. I have a dream that one day our kids will not feel judged by Christians on the basis of their ethnicity, sexual orientation, religion, political preference, or anything else. I have a dream that kids and people all over the world will feel only love from Christians. It's a big dream, a dream I might never see, but without hope that, that dream will come true one day, I would not be here writing this tonight.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

The Summons

On Tuesday, at my Grad study we were reflection on what Redemption is and what it means to us. We were supposed to spend some time looking through hymns to find one that spoke to us on what we think redemption is. I picked The Summons from The Faith We Sing Book that the United Methodists have. Honestly at first I just picked this song because it is one of my favorites. But after I started to reflect on it I realized that this is very much my view of redemption. It might not be yours but I feel that redemption is that Jesus showed us through his life and ultimate sacrifice that we are to continue the work of his redeeming love for us by setting others free and seek justice throughout our lives. I love this song because it is like God speaking to us and summoning us to do his work in the world and let him transform us. All of the Verses are in question form except for the last, as to leave it in our hands, he has redeemed us but now the ball is in our court. And the last verse "we" answer and say that we will go forth and never be the same, we will go where his footsteps show and we will continue to grow. Take some time today to reflect on the words of this song and maybe take some time to think about what redemption means to you.

The Summons

Will you come and follow me if I but call your name?
Will you go where you don't know and never be the same?
Will you let my love be shown,
will you let my name be known,
will you let my life be grown in you and you in me?

Will you leave yourself behind if I but call your name?
Will you care for cruel and kind and never be the same?
Will you risk the hostile stare, should you life attract a scare?
Will you let me answer prayer in your and you in me?

Will you let the blinded see if I but call your name?
Will you set the prisoners free and never be the same?
Will you kiss the leper clean,
and do such as this un-seen?
and admit to what I mean in you and you in me?

Will you love the "you" you hide if I but call your name?
Will you quell the fear inside and never be the same?
Will you ue the faith you've found,
to re-shape the world a-round,
through my sight and touch and sound in you and you in me?

Lord, your summons echoes true when you but call my name
Let me turn and follow you and never be the same
In your company I'll go, where you love and footsteps show
Thus I'll move and live and grow in you and you in me

Monday, March 9, 2009

Fool for Christ

I have been throwing around ideas all morning for a message I will be giving at Chapel on March 25th. I keep coming back to the idea about being a Fool for Christ. When I heard Bart Campolo speak a few weeks ago he brought up the idea to the teens that it's ok to be different and doing radical things if you are following Jesus. But to be prepared because the world will think those things are "foolish". I want to get that idea across to my kids as well. I'll never forget when my dad did a confirmation retreat using the movie Patch Adams (where the Doctor shares the medicine of laughter and humor with his patients and not many people approve). He then came into church and for confirmation Sunday he preached a sermon about being a Fool for Christ. The kids came up to the altar and were confirmed and before they turned around to be presented to the congregation my dad had them all put on red clown noses! As they turned around the congregation erupted in laughter. Yet if those kids walked around with the clown noses on all the time, I doubt they would get the same warm and joyful laughter, instead they would hit criticism and bullying. I am sure the kids didn't realize how profound of a statement they were actually making at the time. But they processed out that day acting like Fools and starting their walk with Christ off right!

I love these 2 scriptures, but at the same time I think they are some of the hardest scriptures to actually live out. It is hard to be different, it is hard to stand up for what is right all the time, it is hard to be something that the world says is foolish. Like the scripture says, We're the Messiah's misfits! Or the title I like is we are Radical Ragamuffins! Obviously back in the early church many were treated as fools or misfits, but now I wonder if we are really living out our faith enough to gain that title. My prayer for us all today is that we can embrace our faith and passion for social justice and peace enough that we will be called misfits and ragamuffins. Be a fool for Christ!

1 Corinthians 4:9-13 (The Message)
9-13It seems to me that God has put us who bear his Message on stage in a theater in which no one wants to buy a ticket. We're something everyone stands around and stares at, like an accident in the street. We're the Messiah's misfits. You might be sure of yourselves, but we live in the midst of frailties and uncertainties. You might be well-thought-of by others, but we're mostly kicked around. Much of the time we don't have enough to eat, we wear patched and threadbare clothes, we get doors slammed in our faces, and we pick up odd jobs anywhere we can to eke out a living. When they call us names, we say, "God bless you." When they spread rumors about us, we put in a good word for them. We're treated like garbage, potato peelings from the culture's kitchen. And it's not getting any better.

1 Corinthians 3:18 (The Message)
18-20Don't fool yourself. Don't think that you can be wise merely by being up-to-date with the times. Be God's fool—that's the path to true wisdom. What the world calls smart, God calls stupid. It's written in Scripture, He exposes the chicanery of the chic. The Master sees through the smoke screens of the know-it-alls.

Friday, March 6, 2009

But Who do you say I am?

Jesus Asked:
"But Who do you say I am?"
Son of Man, Son of God
13When Jesus arrived in the villages of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, "What are people saying about who the Son of Man is?"

14They replied, "Some think he is John the Baptizer, some say Elijah, some Jeremiah or one of the other prophets."

15He pressed them, "And how about you? Who do you say I am?"

16Simon Peter said, "You're the Christ, the Messiah, the Son of the living God."

17-18Jesus came back, "God bless you, Simon, son of Jonah! You didn't get that answer out of books or from teachers. My Father in heaven, God himself, let you in on this secret of who I really am. And now I'm going to tell you who you are, really are. You are Peter, a rock. This is the rock on which I will put together my church, a church so expansive with energy that not even the gates of hell will be able to keep it out.

19"And that's not all. You will have complete and free access to God's kingdom, keys to open any and every door: no more barriers between heaven and earth, earth and heaven. A yes on earth is yes in heaven. A no on earth is no in heaven."

20He swore the disciples to secrecy. He made them promise they would tell no one that he was the Messiah.

In chapel on Wednesday night this is the passage of scripture we focused on. We asked a few kids to write a response to this question, "Who is Jesus to you?". The responses about brought me to tears. I wanted to share one with you:

He is someone I go to when I've got a problem and someone who won't judge me. I also feel Jesus can be people that make a difference on you. Because Jesu made a difference on lots of people. Jesus will not judge people. And to me his opinion matters most. ~B, 17 year old~

I am always amazed at the things my kids will say. They have been through so much pain, but they know Jesus is there for them and will comfort them. Today spend something answering that question Jesus poses to his disciples and now to you, "Who is Jesus to you?".

Jesus Questions

Here are some Jesus Questions to focus on today:

Jesus asks:

Why did you doubt?

Matthew 14:31 (The Message)

31Jesus didn't hesitate. He reached down and grabbed his hand. Then he said, "Faint-heart, what got into you?"


Jesus asks:

Why do you see the speck in your neighbor's eye, but do not
notice the log in your own eye?

Matthew 7

A Simple Guide for Behavior
1-5 "Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It's easy to see a smudge on your neighbor's face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, 'Let me wash your face for you,' when your own face is distorted by contempt? It's this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Is God a community member?

Last night at my Graduate bible study we were discussing what Jesus' sacrifice means to us. We all had different ideas and also had many that overlapped each other. It was nice to spend that time reflecting on what Jesus' sacrifice means to us on a personal level. In many ways that is what Lent is all about. During our study of sacrifice throughout the bible we have come across multiple times the reference to the idea that during the Old Testament sacrifice was always about repairing and maintaining community and personal relationships within the community (which included God as a community member). I posed the question last night on whether we had included God as a community member in our community. It's a hard question to answer because you feel like you should say yes, because we worship because of God and to praise him, right? But do we truly include him as a community member? And also are we creating a community that God would approve of? I think during this season of Lent we are to really look deeply into ourselves and also into our communities to see if we are truly letting God in. Some of the things that I said that Jesus' sacrifice means to me was that idea of unconditional and ultimate love for his children, an ultimate act of love for the community, freedom to live, and many more. But as we approach Holy Week in the weeks to come, I urge you to reflect on what Jesus' sacrifice means to you. Also ask that question of whether you are including God as a community member in your community? The below quote is one of my favorites, I think this would be a community God would approve of.

We are all longing to go home to some place we have never been—a place, half-remembered, and half-envisioned we can only catch glimpses of from time to time. Community. Somewhere, there are people to whom we can speak with passion without having the words catch in our throats. Somewhere a circle of hands will open to receive us, eyes will light up as we enter, voices will celebrate with us whenever we come into our own power. Community means strength that joins our strength to do the work that needs to be done. Arms to hold us when we falter. A circle of healing. A circle of friends. Someplace where we can be free. ~Starhawk~

Monday, March 2, 2009

One

As I shared with you on Sunday, Bart Campolo shared a story of the drug dealer in his neighborhood who he has gotten to know and love, who now stands up and with arms open wide he embraces him each time he sees him. That image has been going through my mind over and over the last few days. I am trying to figure out how this applies to my life, my church, my work. I was looking through some song lyrics for songs that I feel really portray this idea of open arms and unconditional love. I came across a song that I have shared with some of you, and actually one of you is the one who wrote it! This is a song by my dear friend Kelly McRell. She has a lovely soul and the words she shares below are from her heart. She wrote this after coming back from a service trip to Bolivia for a month. Her message goes beyond borders, with the theme that we are all "one". The chorus...
we come from one world/ million miles apart / let us bridge the gap so we may shine out the light /with your open arms and your heart filled with love/ you have opened my eyes to see we are one.


Reflect upon the song below and spend the day figuring out how the image of "open arms" can be applied to your life during this Season of Lent and beyond (feel free to share these with me!):

One – by Kelly McRell

I came to this place with my ego held high
what i needed to bring was my humility's light
we are all born with desire
passion burning bright
with ability to light others like the stars light up the night

we come from one world
million miles apart
let us bridge the gap so we may shine out the light
with your open arms and your heart filled with love
you have opened my eyes to see we are one

we are one people we have one sky
we must work with each other if we want to get by
we are sisters we are brothers
mothers and fathers
let us stand up today and unite as one

I can see through your eyes and i know where you’ve been
I can see your children and know where you’re going
I can see you hands and see your life’s work


http://www.myspace.com/KellyEllyMcRelly **You can listen to the song at this link!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

A bunch of imperfect people

Read the following poem and spend a few minutes on what God's love means to you.

God's Love

by Sri Chinmoy

God-Love outlives
All our imperfections
And limitations.

God’s Love for us
Is overwhelming-
In the inner world
And in the outer world as well.

A day of God-love
Is the only real day
In my heart.

The God-seeker in me longs
To arrive at the goal.
The God-lover in me feels
That he does not have to arrive
At a particular goal,
For God-love itself encompasses
Both the journey's start
And
The journey's goal.


This is one person's reflection on what God's love means to them. I really like the end where is says that "God-love outlives all our imperfections and limitations". We are such imperfect people and yet God loves us no matter what. At this retreat I went to Bart Campolo was the speaker for the weekend and some of you might know him because his dad is Tony Campolo or you might know that he set up the program Mission Year. He now lives in inner-city Cinncinati with his family and a community of friends. He was a phenomenal speaker and he said something yesterday morning that just hit me hard. He was talking about the people that live in his inner city neighborhood, the prostitutes, the drug dealers, the alcoholics, the kids, etc..and he told us about how he started this monday night dinner where he invited about 40 people over to his house to have a meal together, they were not "Former prostitutes, drug dealers, etc" they WERE and would continue to be. They were a bunch of broken people all under one roof, breaking bread together. He said it took about a year before people felt comfortable enough to stay for more than 15 minutes. But slowly they learned to feel included, accepted and above all LOVED. These broken people in Cinncinati might never change, they might never accept Jesus into their hearts, they might never stop dealing drugs, the cycle of poverty might never end, but does that mean a Christians we do nothing. NO! We are called to love. Jesus says the greatest commandment is to LOVE ONE ANOTHER, not to fix one another, not to change one another, not to make everyone a Christian, God just calls us to love. He wants us to love without judgement and to just be there with open arms like the father in the prodigal son story. Bart said that there was one guy that had been a drug dealer for 20 years and only stopped because of getting shot once and now he can't think well. He used to never aknowledge when Bart would walk by him on the street, but now he stands up, when he sees Bart coming and he open his arms to embrace Bart and tell him he loves him. We should be like that drug dealer, waiting with open arms for everyone, no matter their background and no matter if they will ever change.

I just wish every church would act like Bart and his friends do in their communtiy. I wish every United Methodist Church truly lived by their motto to have "Open Doors, Open Hearts, Open Minds". Maybe we should alter it a little and say, "Open Arms". Churches & Christians remain judgemental, are lacking in the unconditional love, and need to stop trying to fix and change people and just embrace them with love. If everyone felt loved, we would have a whole different world.

I have decided I can probably relate everything to working with my kids, they do consume me life. But this is something I needed to hear. Our kids might never be "fixed" or "changed", they might repeat the same abuse their parents hurt them with, they might never get out of the cycle of poverty. Or some of our kids might. But that doesn't mean we give up hope, but we need to focus on just loving them with every ounce that we have in our bodies, to be there when they come home from school or have a crisis, with open arms to embrace them with love. Jesus showed us the way by spending time with the poor, lonely, broken people and loving them unconditionally. I challenge you to love deeply this season of Lent. Find away you or your church can embrace your community and share God's love.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Give up...

A Lenten Reflection

Give up complaining——focus on gratitude.
Give up pessimism——become an optimist.
Give up harsh judgments——think kindly thoughts.
Give up worry——trust Divine Providence.
Give up discouragement——be full of hope.
Give up bitterness——turn to forgiveness.
Give up hatred——return good for evil.
Give up negativism——be positive.
Give up anger——be more patient.
Give up pettiness——become mature.
Give up gloom——enjoy the beauty that is all around you.
Give up jealousy——pray for trust.
Give up gossiping——control your tongue.
Give up sin——turn to virtue.
Give up giving up——hang in there!

"The spiritual quest is not for interesting "spiritual experiences" but for the expansion of our capacity for mercy, the opening of our hearts wide enough to embrace the world, and not just the fragments of it, here and there, which at present we manage to feel with and care about." (Martin L. Smith, A Season for the Spirit, p. 27)

I found this poem and I thought it did a great job of showing how we need to give some things up for this season of Lent but how there are so many things we can gain at the same time. The one I wanted to focus on today was "Give up discouragement ---be full of hope". We have been struggling at work lately with the lack of hope some people have for our kids. I think when they started out in the social work field they were very hopeful. But after 10-20 years of seeing kid after kid go through our program and only a few of them "succeeding" in the terms of going to college, not falling back into the same things, etc...those things weigh on you. For me, new to all of this, I have so much hope for them, maybe unrealistic hope, maybe I am just too new to understand, but either way I have hope. It is very discouraging to hear when other people don't have hope for the kids I work with, and honestly overall the world has no hope for them, that is why they are at our agency. Last night at our Ash Wednesday service we gave ashes to the kids that wanted to come up. I got the opportunity to give them out to half of our kids and staff. It was an experience I am still processing, but one that will last a life time with me. As I made the sign of the cross on their foreheads and said to them, "You were made of dust, but because of Christ you will live forever", and saw them in awe of a new ritual of the Church they had never seen, and I took my time to look at each one of their faces. They are my hope. The staff that day after day work with these kids even when they punch them, spit on them, kick them , cuss them out, they still love these kids unconditionally. And our kids who have been through hell but still want to come to Chapel, receive Ashes and praise the God they love so much. Giving ashes was a humbling experience, one that set the tone for Lent. Hope is all around us, and as the quote from A Season of the Spirit, says, these spiritual experiences we will have during Lent, is much more than just an experience but an "expansion of our capacity for mercy, the opening of our hearts wide enough to embrace the world". Open your heart wide enough to embrace the world this season, and be full of hope to share with others.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Lent is hard

Everytime I think of Lent, I can't help but remember when we lived in Buffalo, NY that everyone thought my dad was talking about Lint in your belly button not the season of Lent. This is one of those words that in the south people say them the exact same way, but some how in the north they can pronounce these two words to sound differently. Personally, I just think they are supposed to sound the same, like Ginny and Jenny. But I have been told I am wrong. But Lent is more than just an issue with accents.

As I have been preparing how to approach these lenten devotionals I have promised so many, I feel like I am trying to work on an impossible project. The Advent devotionals came so much easier to me, it's so easy to write about your favorite christmas songs and the joys that surround advent. Advent is a time of waiting and I guess my patience has grown from working with these kids, so maybe that is why it was easier to write those devotionals. Lent is hard, its more vague, people go about observing Lent in various ways, it makes you focus inward on ourselves, its makes us vulnerable. Each year I try to give something up for Lent, and I try to be more reflective and observant. I feel like each year I fall short, I get too busy and loose sight of Lent. Last year I decided I was not even going to bother giving something up because I knew I wouldn't last. This year I have to make a change and really observe Lent.

When it comes to our lives we get so caught up in the hustle of life, of the everyday to-do list, our life plans and the pressures of a consumer society. We run from silence because we're afraid of being alone with God. So, like Jesus, we need to take some serious time to pray and figure out where God is in our lives, and where God is calling us to serve. We need to re-focus our lives to be more in line with God.

So somehow through the next 40+ days of devotions I am going to stretch myself to be vulnerable to God and take some serious time to be in silence, pray, figure out what God wants for me and also to re-focus my life.

Below are some links to blogs/websites with ideas on things you can give up for lent, add for lent, or just ways to observe. So as we prepare for Ash Wednesday tomorrow, let us stop and be still and listen to God and see how he wants us each to observe this season of Lent.

http://www.umc.org/site/c.lwL4KnN1LtH/b.2514885/k.63E6/Lent_and_Easter_Resources.htm

http://www.greendaily.com/2009/02/24/how-about-going-green-for-lent/

Tomorrow I will post some more practical Lenten ideas.

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Ash Wednesday




A Prayer for Ash Wednesday

(extinguish candles)

The darkness asks us questions.
You are out there and we do not see.
You invite us into the night,
the stillness, the loneliness, the desert place.

We cannot see our shadow;
the cold damp of unknowing rises up from beneath
our feet.
We tread cautiously, tentatively.

We are afraid,
afraid of ghosts
haunting us with specters of guilt
and shame.

We would like to run back,
reach the river bank,
swim the Jordan,
sit in the sun by the sea,
mending our nets.
But you have brought us here
- with no bread.

When we look we can see only ourselves,
our darkness.
When we read,
it is invisible words which cannot be grasped,
thoughts we cannot clutch,
hope we cannot capture.

Yet the wild honey remains a taste in our mouth,
a memory for a new day.

Why have you brought us here?
What miracle will you perform for us?

The darkness sighs around us,
dense with your unseen presence,
close to our breathing,
close to our breathing.

O darkness, enlighten us,
embrace us with your invisible love.
Let us see your glory in the ashes.
Take us by the hand that we may trust the
darkness.
Minister to us by your Spirit that we may not be
afraid.
Jesus, keep the beasts away.

Amen

(light candles)
~William Loader~

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Leaning on God


This is going to be a typical "Babbling Brooke" devo today, so sorry if it doesn't make sense. I feel like this weekend has caused me to have a lot of questions, some doubts, frustrations, and has just caused me to just need some where to lean, to rest awhile and figure out all these thought that are racing through my mind. I think after spending about 6 hours in a car by myself, going to a retreat with a good speaker, and just spending a lot of time trying to reflect on life, it has caused me to search for answers. Some answers I will never figure out, some that I am ok with never knowing, and some I struggle with letting go of. I love this poem, I just picture myself leaning on all these different things before I finally lean on God. Joyce Rupp does an amazing job of displaying my thoughts and feelings and I am sure yours as well into this poem below. Let it be your reflection today.

Some people lean against fence posts
when their bodies ache from toil.
Some people lean on oak trees,
seeking cool shade on hot, humid days.

Some people lean on crutches
when their limbs won't work for them;
and some people lean on each other
when their hearts can't stand alone.

How long it takes to lean upon you,
God of shelter and strength;
how long it takes to recognize the truth
of where my inner power has its source.

All my independence, with its arrogance,
stands up and stretches within me,
trying to convince my trembling soul
that I can conquer troubles on my own.

But the day of truth always comes
when I finally yield to you, God,
knowing you are a steady stronghold,
a refuge when times are tough.

Thank you for offering me strength,
for being the oak tree of comfort;
thank you for being the sturdy support
when the limbs of my life are weak.

Praise to you, Eternal Lean-to,
for always being there for me.
Continue to transform me
with the power of your love.

~Joyce Rupp~

"Which of you walks in darkness and sees no light? ....lean on God." Isaiah 50:4-10

Seeking and Finding

I search for God
elusive, hidden God,
I long to dwell
in the heart of Mystery.

I search for my true self
more of who I already am,
knowing there's so much
yet to be discovered.

I search for love,
the unconditional love
that enfolds me
and asks to be shared.

I search for vision
in the shadows of my soul,
impatiently awaiting
the moment of lighting.

I search for a quiet heart
amid life's harried schedule;
my soul cries out,
yearning for solitude.

I search for compassion
in a world gone deaf
to the cries of the hurting,
and the please of the powerless.

I search for a Home,
always for Home
unaware, of course,
that I am already there.

~Joyce Rupp~

"When you search for me, you will find me; when you search wholeheartedly for me, I shall let you find me."
-Jeremiah 29:13-

1. Reflect on the inner moments of your life. has God ever come seeking you? If so, how did this happen? what did you do in response? Did this seeking change you in any way?


2. Look within yourself. What are the deepest longings of your heart? Who and what do you most seek? make a list of these or draw a heart and fill it with words or images.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Preperation for a Lenten Journey

So the season of Lent is just around the corner. I can't believe it is already here, it seems like we just finished Advent. These feelings could be because I have just recently finished a United Methodist Women's Program for Advent for their 2010 book, so I have had lots of Advent ideas flowing through my head. I am not excited to switch gears though and move into Lent. It seems that every year I try hard to start some way of observing Lent, and I never see it through. Well this year, all my trusty Blog followers out there are going to hold me accountable and maybe I can help you out as well. Each day I will reflect upon a question, scripture, quote, song, etc...here on the blog and I urge you to comment on the reflection, reflect on the same thing as I do, or respond in whatever way you feel appropriate. This will not be like my Advent Devotional Book because we have already prepared ways for our kids here at CCH to observe Lent. But don't worry I will have an Advent Devo next year because of multiple requests. Below is an excerpt from a book by female UMC pastors (I figure I should start learning from this wise words if I am going to become one someday soon) that I am reading and this is from Margaret W. Bickford from the New England Annual Conference.

As you embark on your Lenten journey, consider the following questions:
1. Am I impatient with God? other people? myself? why?
2. Am I too quick to judge and dismiss God or other people when they don't meet my expectations?
3. Am I suspicious of GOd or other people because of my own doubt or fear?
4. Do I really want to know the truth about myself, to confess my shortcomings, and to repent (turn about and go in an entirely new and better direction), so that I may be renewed?
5. Am I really open to God's presence in my life, or do I still distrust the Divine Presence?
6. Am I really open to GOd's unconditional love, or do I still feel unworhty and unable to give as I have received?
7. Am I really ready to become Jesus' disciple, to put everything else in second place or into God's hands?

I also recommend that you keep a journal to note issues and questions you consider, challenges, who and what you have prayed fro, and how you have changed during these forty-plus days. The record may suprise you. In any cause, your journey will take on a deeper dimension as you focus on your soul's health and your relationship with the Lord. When the darkness of Maundy Thursday and Good Friday are finally dispersed by the light of Easter morning, you will feel that light deep in your soul and will truly be able to rejoice.


I am going to try to answer these questions myself before and during the Lenten Journey. I urge you to as well. Please join me in this journey of Lent.

Friday, February 13, 2009

New Kid on the Block

We have a new kid at CCH and he is just adorable! It's hard when you know the kids background before you meet them. For this kid I thought he would seem really "hard" or "bad" on the outside, and that it might appear that it is almost "hopeless" for this kid due to their past. But then I walked into the kids room as he was about to go to sleep and he is all cuddled up in his quilt and has his teddy bear in his arms. And I saw a whole new kid, a scared kid, a lonely kid, a kid that desperately needs to feel loved, I saw God's child, and everything I knew before I walked in that room vanishes and he is just a kid that needs love. He needs love that I can attempt to give, and love from God that I can share with him. And as I finish the book I read to him, I pull his covers up and say goodnight. He says, "Miss Brooke...can you say a prayer for me?" And a little caught off guard but so glad he asked, I say yes. I asked if there was something specific he wanted me to pray for and he said, "You will know what words to say". I almost teared up as I prayed for this kid, that I just met the day before, the kid I had pre-judged, the kid that needed to just be embraced by love, and I prayed for his new journey here at CCH. Sure enough God did give me the words.

Society has rejected him because they only new him from papers, reports and incidents.

I saw a glimpse into his heart. There is no way I can reject him now. This New Kid on the Block, makes me smile.