This Little Light of Mine, I'm gonna let it shine!

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...

Oh Tuesday I was coming back from a day full of training and I grabbed my stuff from the office and was headed out to go home, when I heard some singing. One of our kids had come up to the Chapel to let out some steam through singing. Already 2 other staff had joined in on the singing. He saw me at the door and told me I had to come in and start singing as well. After a few minutes we had the whole Public Relations department in the chapel singing "This little light of mine". He had us make up different verses and it was hilarious. I haven't seen our staff that happy in a long time. He wanted us to close with sharing our favorite scripture and then praying together. It was simply adorable, and a complete "God moment". I wish you could have all been there to hear him sing and see us, it was really funny and wonderful. That's all I just wanted to share that with yall!

The Windy City

I just wanted to write a quick note. I loved my trip to Chicago! It was great to see a familiar face and have some time to chat and process the last month with another US-2. I know I needed it and I think Meg did too. We walked a lot over the 2 days I was there and I am worn out! But we did get to see a lot of the city and now when others come to visit (HINT HINT) I will know where to take people!

This is one place to the left that we went that is in Millennium Park. People call it "the bean" or the "cloud gate" it is all stainless steel and if you go underneath it you get to see this...it's pretty sweet, and there are
Meg and I waving!!! It is sadly one of
our only pictures together!

We ate lots of ethnic food...thai, mexican, and american diner. She lives in a really cool Co-op community house and I enjoyed staying there. I will post some more pictures from the trip later. But for now I am completely exhausted and need to get some sleep before another crazy week begins!

Thank you all for reading my blog!
Come visit me and we can go to Chicago!

Cornfield sunsets & lots of joy

These are not my pictures but I wanted to share the beautiful sight I saw last night but of course I didn't have my camera with me! Outside of my little Champaign-Urbana city you hit country and cornfields. It is actually really beautiful out there. I unexpectedly got to see the sunset out in the country last night and I am so glad I did. It looked just like these pictures! Everyone that told me the midwest has the most beautiful sunsets...they were certainly almost right. They have BEAUTIFUL sunsets, but I cannot discount the gorgeous sunsets of NC at the mountains and the beach.

I also had a great time at the Grad bible study I am going to now. I am starting to make friends with the people there and it is really nice to have a group people around my age that love God and are seeking to live more faithfully for him. I thank you for all the prayers on this because it has been hard but I am finally feeling that this is slowly taking care of itself.

Work is going great too! Compared to a week or 2 ago my life is feeling a lot better all around. I do not have anything really insightful for you right now but maybe after tonight at Chapel. I will be gone to Chicago this weekend to visit my fellow US-2 Meg! I can't wait and I think it will be a great time for us to enjoy each others company, swap stories, and enjoy the city of Chicago (which I have never been too!). After leaving NYC, and having lived in Philly last summer, I am kinda missing the big city life slightly so I think it will be a good time! I miss you all! I officially will be in NC, December 22 - January 6th, so let's make plans!!!

We are one body, one body in Christ

Chapel this week was wonderful. I wish I could have video taped it and zoomed in on each person's facial expressions throughout the whole service. Here are the highlights:

1. Choir practice for the girls for the hour before Chapel was WONDERFUL everyone came with an open mind and ready to sing & praise the Lord. I enjoyed singing with the girls.

2. The girls even sang parts in the music during the service and they sounded BEAUTIFUL! They sang, Agnus Dei and Answer Me. The words were just so simply beautiful,
"Alleluia
Alleluia
For the Lord God Almighty reigns"

3. T, one of the girls I am starting to build a relationship with sang a solo. She sang, "We are one body"...we sang it a few weeks ago (ironically on a night that the girls choir was in uproar and were not acting like they were "one body in Christ".) But for some reason it really stuck in her head and she felt God leading her to sing it again in Chapel. So she did and I cannot tell you how hard it was the fight back the tears. She had everyone on their feet singing, clapping and praising the Lord for how amazing he is and how he works in all these kids lives. I mean all the kids, all the staff, she had everyone up out of their seats! PICTURE...about 40 people, of all races, all ages, all different backgrounds, many kids that have been sexually abused, physically abused, that have mental diagnoses of all different variations...all in one room, listening to this young woman who has been through SO much, praising God through her voice and singing...

We are one body, one body in Christ;
and we do not stand alone.
We are one body, one body in Christ;
and he came that we might have life.

1. Can you hear them crying, can you feel their pain?
   Will you feed my hungry, will you help my lame?
   See the unborn baby, the forgotten one,
   they are not forsaken, they are not unloved
2. I am the Way, the Truth, the Life, I am the Final Sacrifice,
   I am the Way, the Truth, the Life;
   he who believes in me will have eternal life.
   I am the Way, the Truth, the Life, I am the Final Sacrifice,
   I am the Way, the Truth, the Life;
   he who believes in me will have eternal life.
   (to Verse 4)
3. I have come, your Savior, that you might have life,
   through the tears and sorrow, through the toils and strife.
   Listen when I call you, for I know your need,
   come to me, your shepherd, for my flock I feed.
4. On the rock of Peter, see my Church I build.
   Come receive my spirit, with my gifts be filled.
   For you are my body, you're my hands and feet.
   Speak my word of life to ev'ryone you meet.

4. And to make things even better, the Chaplain spoke about "taking a step out in faith" and the kids got to touch water from the actual Jordan River! The kids thought this was the most awesome thing ever and they all took it really seriously and paused before they touched it. I mean I was really intrigued by it too.

5. To end the night the Boys Choir sang. Which they are the sweetest boys, they work so hard and are just wonderful. They dressed up in button downs and khaki's and sang their hearts out to "Open the Eyes of my Heart" and "Lord I lift your name on High"...and let me tell you everyone was back up on their feet supporting the boys.

We truly were "One Body in Christ" last night and it was beautiful. The kids bring so much joy to my life. I was such on high last night when I got home, I was just so excited to be here.

Polar Bears, Garbage Trucks, and future Presidents

I must say that I just got back from 2 of the best hours of my life! I walked out of my apartment around 7:30 thinking I had plenty of time to get to one of the units to read at 8. But then over halfway there I realized I had forgot my keys to get into the unit. So I had to walk briskly back. Then it was 7:45 so I decided I would bike to work. So I ran and got my bike. I didn't take into account that it is REALLY windy tonight. So the not so strenuous bike ride turned into a good work out lol. I arrived at the unit at 8:01. Well then it was fine because the kids bedtimes just got moved to 8:30 or later so I had 30 minutes to chill with the staff and some of the kids which was fun. Then I read to 2 of the kids. I had gone to the library and brought them a selection of about 8 books. The first kid, Z, is just the most amazing kid and such a cutie. He told me that he wants me to get books about Caterpillars for next week. Then he asked me to pray with him before I turned the lights off. It made my heart melt.

After reading to Z I went down the hall to L's room. He picked the 2 longest books, 1 about Garbage trucks in NYC, called, I STINK, which is really cute. And then he picked a book about polar bears in the North and global warming. They both have a really good message. But the funny thing is, we were reading the Garbage truck one and L got to the part where they were dumping trash into the Hudson Bay and he said, "Brooke, that is a disgrace! That is uncalled for. When I become President I will be fixing that problem, yes I will be the first president to fix it!". I love his enthusiasm and excitement to make the world and God's creation a better place. He also asked me to pray with him and it just meant a lot to me.

Then J one of the kids I was supposed to read to fell asleep while I was reading to L, so we just decided I would read to him next week. But one of the older girls T told one of the staff she wanted to talk to me for a bit. So I ended up talking to her for like 30 minutes and it was just really good. She really poured out her heart to me and told me she wanted me to get to know her. This was really good because she is in Gospel Choir with me on Wednesday's and I need to build a good relationship with her. I just sat and listened as she told me about the hard times in her life, her struggles now, and what she wants for the future. At the end we prayed together and just thanked God for that time together. So we are going to make that a time for us to talk since she has a later bedtime. It means later nights on Monday's, but I think its all worth it.

I just had to share that with you all. Praise God, is about all I can say about it, it was just one of those wonderful nights. On my bike ride home I just let the wind blow on me a fresh sense of God's embrace and now I am going to bed very happy:)

One Day

I have been meaning to post lyrics to a song one of our kids wrote, they had it published in the Agency newsletter so I feel it is ok to share this information with you all. This is just an example of the extreme creative nature these kids have. Today I led groups for 2 of the units and they really showed their creative side when I asked them to think about their journey and how God has protected them on their journey's. I showed them different artwork, songs, poems about different people's journey's and how they felt God helping them along the way. I used a song from the group Alathea called, Be My Guide, then a painting by an old friend Jonathan (picture on the left) that is showing God leading him out of dark times, and then a poem I wrote about life being like a Labyrinth. It amazes me how these kids who have been through so much crap, never blame God for it. Their faith and strength is so much beyond my own. I am learning from them each and every day. They know God is their protector, and they know that their Help comes from the Lord like it says in Psalm 121: 1-8. I just ask for continued prayers for the young men and women that I work with, that they will always feel God's protection for them on their journeys.

One Day
by T, a resident at the home

VERSE:
One day the world will be a better place
For each and every single human race.
This is a dream we all have to chase.
We need hard work and persvereance.
No matter what rank of their experience.
We need to understand each other.
Through good times and bad times, sunshine and thunder.
We need to be more positive about ourselves.
We need to throw away the bad times, put them on shelves.
Do what's right for us. Gain and learn how to trust.
We need to teach the next generation love and how to love.
Teach them positive things - stay away from drugs.
So one day we will overcome.

CHORUS:
We will overcome
We will overcome
Streets, projects, and slums
No matter where ya from
We will overcome someday

VERSE:
The Lord says to worship him, not false idols.
For the Lord has the almighty title.
No man can overthrow the Lord's reign.
He taught His love through Bibles, books, and glass of stain.
The goodness of the Lord drives me insane.
I can't get Him out of my mind, blood and veins.
So when you sit there hurt and in pain.
He'll get you through it.
Yes we will overcome.

CHORUS:
We will overcome
We will overcome
Streets, projects, and slums
No matter where ya from
We will overcome someday.

Calls, coffee, prayers and a letter

God never ceases to amaze me. He definitely has a lot of people looking over me and out for me. There is that "Great cloud of witnesses" cheering me onward each step that I take, and there are also so many people on earth hear cheering me onward as well. I had a pretty down week. I am having a rough time not having met a lot of people yet. It's been hard, and I have shed some tears over it. I feel like I am trying everything and it's just not working. Yet, somehow I have gotten through it and am standing strong. That is all because of God and every single person that has prayed for me, called me, sent me mail, e-mailed me, or just thought of me throughout the last month.

I am thankful to my friends from college that keep me updated with life back in Boone, but also listen to me and listen to my new experiences. I am so glad they call me, make me laugh from a far, and are just there for me. I cannot thank my family enough for calling me each day or letting me call them multiple times during the day. For my brother putting up with me texting him to check on him, and also tell him about my life. For all my US-2 family for listening to me vent, or share the good and bad times. For their prayers, e-mails, and support I am so grateful.

Today I got home after having a really good conversation with someone from the grad bible study I go to. We met for coffee and it was something I needed so desperately. I am so thankful to Caci for sitting there and listening to me, and also sharing her life with me as well. That was a highlight of the week. But just to make things even better, I got back to the apartment and I had a letter from Greg (one of my fellow US-2s serving in Baltimore, who is also from NC) and he informed me that he was my prayer partner (we had kept it a secret until we all got to our locations). It was a completely unexpected letter and it just gave me the encouragement I needed right now. Greg is a great friend and I am so glad to know I have him praying for me each day, that gives me so much peace and joy.

A great cloud of witnesses

The last few days I have been feeling the reality of being a missionary settling in. For the first week or so, everything was new and overwhelming. I was just trying to get settled into a new place. Now, even though I am still settling in, it is becoming more of a reality to why I am here. I chose to answer a calling I felt from God to go out and serve his people, the marginalized in society. He called me to a place I never thought I would live, Urbana, IL...a place where I know no one, I don't have a car, and I am 12 hours away from what I call home. No I am not off in Africa or Alaska, but I am away from what is comfortable to me, and from the people I love.

It is different when you go off and do missions for a spring break or a summer, when it becomes your life, each and every day, it becomes something like never before. Going into this I honestly thought somethings would be hard, but I thought I would have a lot easier time making new friends and feeling right at home rather fast. That's how it has always been for me in other places. This time is different, this time it is hard, it's stretching me and challenging me more than I have ever been challenged before. Don't get me wrong, I am not unhappy, I don't think that is the word....but I am uncomfortable, lonely, nervous, and in a state of complete reliance on God.

I love my new job, it is challenging but I am getting to do stuff that I really enjoy. The kids have been through so much yet they have so much joy to bring each day as well. I am learning I really do like this churchish work stuff, even though sometimes the church makes me crazy. I know I am in the right place, and I have not doubted that at all. I am confident that God called me here and wants me to be here. But I'm not going to lie, right now its hard when I come home from work and I don't have a friend to run and see if I had a bad day, or just someone to hang out with. I got spoiled living with all my friends over the last 4 years. I got used to being busy beyond belief each day of the week. Yet each day God is teaching me little lessons of patience, perserverance, that it is ok to struggle and feel lonely, that being in mission is not always easy, the importance of community, and that I really need to learn these lessons.

I was reading a section in this book called, Concepts of Missions that was put out by the UMW. It discusses the scripture of Genesis 11:31 and 12:1-3. It is talking about Abram and how God called him and said, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father's house to the land that I will show you." God offered Abram a direction on the road to take, but Abram had no idea where he was going. I kind of feel like that is what happened with God and I. He called me to do this US-2 Missionary program, and that led to the direction on a road to Urbana, IL...but I honestly had no idea where I was going and what I was getting myself into. Yet, Abram was faithful to God and God was always with Abram. The book talks about how later in the scriptures in the Epistle to the Hebrews the writer, "says with a profound sense of admiration for Abraham, that he is one of the great cloud of witnesses for faithful mission because "he went out not knowing where he went" (Heb. 12:8)

The book further goes on to say that "God's call is a responsibility. It is a major undertaking. This call demands our total being." So in all this I find peace to know that there is great cloud of witnesses from ancient times, to closer to the present, that have gone on before me, but have served God faithfully. It was not always easy, but they got through it. They followed the call. So I hope I can remember daily this scripture, that is gaining new meaning for me, from Heb. 12:1 "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses let us also lay aside every weight and sin that clings so closely, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us."

Even though some days are rough, and I haven't met a whole lot of friends yet, I thank God for his faithfulness to me, for his love and strength. I thank all the ones that have gone before me that have served in their own ways. This song really encourages me and Carolyn Arends is a beautiful song writer.

I was just four, my grandmother’s place
I knelt by her sofa and started this race
And now I’ve been running for such a long while
I’ve kind of lost track of the miles
Sometimes I press on, sometimes I look back
Sometimes I just lay in the road on my back
When I’ve got to get up and I don’t know how
I hear in the distance the roar of a crowd

It’s the great cloud of witnesses
Cheering me on each step that I go
It’s the great cloud of witnesses
They say the finish is worth every inch of the road

Moses is there, up in his seat
With my Grandad Wilfred, my Nana Bernice (Pa-Paw Dickens and Newsome)
There’s Abraham, Isaac and my buddy Rich (counsin Amie)
And I think they’re shouting "don’t quit"

So if you are tired, and your back is sore
If you’re not so sure you can run anymore
Then just take a moment and listen real close
Do you hear a sound like a heavenly host?

It’s the great cloud of witnesses
Cheering us on each step that we go
It’s the great cloud of witnesses
They say the finish is worth every inch of the road

It’s friends and relations and each generation of saints who believed
And received The Prize
They have looked into His eyes

It’s the great cloud of witnesses …

I close with this prayer from the book...

O God of mission, as we cross borders in our lives, give us wisdom and courage to continue the journey. Grant us vision to see new horizons and new places where your liberating love needs us. In Jesus' name. Amen.